Dear Readership of the Wilderness of Mirrors Blog,
Today we are writing to share the life story of a couple who contacted us looking to spread awareness of an issue they encountered in their life. We found their story difficult to deal with and we thought we’d share it with you. If anyone out there has any information for Cinder and Block, please let us know and we’ll pass it on. Without further ado, here is the email we received from Cinder:
Dear Wilderness of Mirrors Blog,
My life partner and I decided to have a new dream three weeks ago. Our new dream is to become extragenderal forms of ourselves. We are only attracted to extragenderal people, and we like each other, so we are both going to do it together. Unfortunately we have no idea how and we don’t know any extragenderal people and we’ve never seen one, and we don’t even know what they look like!
As it turns out humans are a lot like humans. Specifically the trips humans took away from earth to the other planets. Remember that humans have been trying desperately to get away from earth for a long time. Yet they have hardly managed to reach the moon. Humans seem trapped on Earth partly because it is the only thing they know, and mostly because the force of gravity is substantial near massive bodies. We think us humans face a similar problem. Except instead of the earth trapping us, we are trapped by the typical male to female gender spectrum. Unfortunately, we are trapped by massive bodies, but mostly because the male-to-female gender range is the only one we know. We have been trying desperately to get away from all existing genders and discover extragenderal forms.
Every known gender exists between male and female, we are trying to venture into the unknown. We think perhaps there are even other gender planets and moons out there.
When we went to the doctor they refused to give us the operation. In fact they plainly lied and said “no such thing exists” even after we told them that we knew all about the rocket ships that went to the moon. We were shocked that such narrow mindedness still exists.
Since aliens are not humans, the analogy of the rocket ship does not apply to them, so we suspect they all have extragenderal forms and can easily help us achieve our dream. However, we have not contacted any aliens because we are still trying to figure out how to communicate with extragenderal beings.
Allen and Luke, your blog is obviously very popular. We know you take the time to understand each and every person who reads your blog. This allows you to serve them finely crafted relevant content. In fact, some say your blog is so great that they can’t believe they ever watched opera, cooking shows, Lost, Disney Channel, The Chronicles of Narnia, or commercials when they should have just been reading your blog. They are very happy you decided to start the blog.
The point is, given the number of people you know, you surely must know someone who has flown in a gender rocket ship. Can you help us achieve this dream we’ve had ever since three weeks ago of becoming gendernaughts?
Again, we know absolutely nothing about this, and we are hoping our readership can help us out. We would also like to add that we are not sure about moon landings ourselves, and that we have a research project in the works to determine conclusively whether the moon is a spherical body or merely a perfectly tossed Frisbee.
Thanks for Reading!